Justin Herbert is Falling Apart: Week 15 Picks

Aristotle once said, "he who has overcome fear will truly be free." 

When was unearthed out of the Kentrotas’ seaside plot in Tripiti, Milos Island, they never found the arms. 

The year-round residents on Milos are a faithful few. The whispers travel and the rumor mill churns. We heard it like this from theio Dionysos; In the years after the discovery, locals and enterprising tourists alike were searching for the arms. Klima Bay, a mere nondescript and rocky fishing inlet, was inundated with the distinct orange tips of snorkelers scanning the terrain below. It was there that the rumored scuffle between the Turkish/Ottoman and French sailors dislodged the statue and lost the arms forever. 

This lasted a couple of years, and some took advantage. Yianni opened a snorkel shop, selling copies of subterranean maps and ancient shipping routes to desperate throngs. The getting was good while it lasted, so he even cut a hole in a kaiki, jimmying some plexiglass for his “glass boat” tour/searches. It was a bona fide “arms race,” and he was capitalizing. 

His son Aristides was nine; an inquisitive kid, observant and perceptive. He read and tinkered while others played soccer in the square and showed off their bravado to disinterested girls. Like an intuitive horseman analyzing stallions pre-race, he had an eye for credibility and collected morsels from the most knowledgeable visitors. He’d take notes and piece together tidbits of information, putting the treasure map together in his mind’s eye. 

It is rumored he had his dad take him a quarter of a nautical mile offshore at the spot where ancient ships without modern radars ran aground in the shallows of the underwater rock outcroppings.

He’d snorkel for hours and dive until his lips were blue and his eardrums collapsed. Relentless, on the fourth day he lifted some loose sediment, and there in the crag was an arm; a thing of beauty, intricate detail, and natural expression. 

In resistance to the powers that had divested the Hellenistic statue from its rightful home in Milos, Yianni insisted Aristides hide the arm for safekeeping under the tenth olive tree of the tenth row. Rumor has it it’s still there today. 

Arm or not, the show must go on! We all know that, like the Louvre, the NFL is centerstage for appendage-less antiquity (see Phillip Rivers). That stiff stormtrooper protrusion connected to Herbert’s left shoulder last Sunday was not an arm, but something less; the incongruent, fragile plaster imposter of an ancient craftsman’s marble carving.

Two fumbles, seven sacks, 46% completion rate, and one interception are the evidence. On the other hand (pun intended), he continued to use his legs very effectively to run the ball. At least the Chargers dare to play their starting quarterback under difficult circumstances, unlike Washington, which seems to be operating in fear. Maybe the Commanders decided they have a fragile orchid at signal caller that might get hurt playing football!

Yes, the Bolts are in the playoff chase, so you risk more, but Washington appears to be preparing to shut their starting QB down with a quarter of the season left.

Will Justin’s real arm turn up? Or will the robotic stiff replacement hinder his artistic expression on the stage? Traveling to play the Chiefs in the cold on short rest is not an ideal matchup after the bruising game the Chargers played against the Eagles. Take the Chiefs (-5.5). We are going full contrarian and taking the Saints (+2.5) at home against the Panthers. This has to be one of the biggest rat lines around, with the Panthers coming off a bye and playing for the chance to take over the NFC South. Finally, take Jacksonville (-13.5) against the feisty Jets' special teams who are starting their third-string quarterback Brady Cook. Who?

Exactly.

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Season 21-20